“Can’t we just stay at home? You know, have a staycation.”
The words were seemingly being prised out of my 15-year-old daughter in a mumbling monotone cognisant to anyone familiar with British comedian Harry Enfield’s character, Kevin the Teenager.
Although initially reluctant to go into details, the reason for my daughter’s apparent apathy on the topic of where we should go for our annual summer holiday this year would become slightly clearer over the next painstakingly slow couple of hours or so. This, in turn, would set off a train of thought that left me considering the topic at large in greater detail.
What is a holiday? What should it be? And how can it be utilised to everyone’s satisfaction?
Bracing For the Summer
The summer months are rapidly approaching, and if you have not already done so, chances are you are now considering what to do with yourself and the kids during their long(ish) absence from school. It is a reasonably safe bet that, at least, part of this period is going to be spent together. Thus, what are the considerations one needs to ponder in terms of how best to allocate time?
Social media would have us believe that we are not living if we are not constantly jetting off to some far-flung island, where the coconut trees are as plentiful as the cocktails and the sun-kissed sands. But what of reality? Is that kind of hedonistic ‘get-away-from-it-all’ really productive to family quality time in this day and age? And if not, what better alternatives can be considered?
Time is Money (?)
It has been said by many a wise sage that “time is money“. Well, perhaps. But what is true is that most of us do not want to waste either time or money—yet we often end up seemingly wasting both when it comes to a holiday.
For example, personally, I can recall excursions when my family wanted to do merely a little more than sit in a hotel room in London or Glasgow. Instead, they preferred spending their time watching Netflix or playing games on their cellphones.
Avoiding a ‘Box Ticking’ Exercise
What about the concept of undertaking a journey or an excursion that entails an element of culture? That sounds good, doesn’t it? This can be in a family setting, in a tour package, or as part of an educational project such as a summer camp or educational trip.
On the face of things, this concept could be beneficial. However, beneficial to exactly whom and in what way?
For instance, when my daughter was offered the chance to visit China this coming summer break on a school-organised ‘camp’, she immediately and categorically declined.
“But think of all that culture you would be breathing in,“ I tried to enthuse for her. “Thousands of years of heritage at your fingertips. It’s the chance of a lifetime.“
My daughter, however, remained unconvinced. Her train of thought ran along the lines that after a hard year of studying and exams, the last thing she wanted to do now was to traipse around a foreign country—as nice as China undoubtedly is—and ‘be forced’ to take in the sights. She wanted—more like, she insisted—to simply relax and unwind instead.
“How about a tour to Europe?“ I then suggested, nervously checking the bank balance.
Same deal, she responded—which means no deal at all. That would, she explained, also entail being herded from post to post with limited time to take anything in properly, and would end up being little more than a ‘box ticking’ exercise of places visited. In this, at least, I had to concede she had a point. I have personally never been a great fan of package holidays, in which every waking (and sleeping) moment is seemingly accounted for.
Rethinking Counterproductive Travels
This is not to say that real-world experiences and learning cannot be extremely rewarding and beneficial, of course. It is just that they need to be carefully planned.
Persuaded to elaborate, my daughter later opined that the learning process outside of the formal education system should be passive and absorbing rather than explicit and, as she put it, ‘forced’. Experiential education journeys, she expanded, are wonderful when they come with both purpose and objective—but should not be driven independently. She argues that to do so does not constitute a holiday.
Does she have a point?
If travelling becomes counterproductive with overpacked itineraries and travel fatigue, then have the aims of the getaway been genuinely met? Have those aims even been properly identified in the first place?
Maybe a happy medium can be reached. A partial staycation can produce benefits in that it allows for a period of unwinding without the pressure and stress of travel. There is no packing of suitcases, trips to airports, or crying kids (yours or others) on long-haul flights. Instead, there is, at the very least, a chance to spend some actual quality family time together.
This can be interspersed with a shorter trip somewhere if finances and time allow, but this journey could be one of travel with intention—instead of pressure. This means we may mix some structured experiences with a healthy dosage of free time. It is not necessary to always be doing something, as we can choose depth over quantity. Some ideas in this range would include, perhaps, embarking on one meaningful activity per day and allowing children some degree of choice.
Redefining family holidays
A holiday should leave a degree of space for spontaneity. Perhaps, the real measure of a good holiday is not how much we manage to do, but how we feel at the end of it.
A good holiday—especially one that involves your family—should be about whether we return rested, reconnected, and ready for what comes next, rather than simply exhausted from trying to fit everything in.